I can’t

Unicorn“You are limitless. You are only limited by the poverty of your own dreams. You can do everything you want if you’re motivated enough”.

Nice quotes. I once believed in them with all my heart… I dreamed high and wide and deep and far… and I did wonderful things, things I thought I’d never do…
But then comes a time when you have to face your limits. You are given 2 options: you change/adapt or you disappear.

Take a look at the photo above. You might think it’s about dieting but it’s not really so. I will tell you what I see. I see an exhausted rhinoceros trying to live by his own dream of becoming an unicorn. The words are a sarcastic remark and many of you might think it’s a demotivational photo. You may or may not be right.

It’s reality check: unicorns do not exist. The dream is utopian.

My entire life I believed in unicorns, just like many of us. I tried to be or to do things that are impossible. It’s true that this gives you a lot of arousal – challenging the impossible. But it comes a time when, even if you see everything with clarity, even if you did absolutely everything right (according to your opinion), you still can’t change certain things. And you’re forced to say those damn words:

“I can’t!”

The idea is that every available experience in life could be roughly classified into 3 categories:

what you can do,
what you could do with a lot of effort
and what you can’t do.

Nobody told me about this. I had to discover this by myself a couple of days ago. Or should I say I was told several times this truth, by several people around me, but I was deaf because I wanted to believe in unicorns? Could be…

The problem with these 3 categories is that it takes time to know where to put each situation, depending on your life-experience. That’s why there are motivational speakers: they teach us that a lot of stuff that we believe to reside in the “I can’t” group is in fact in the “I could, but with effort” group. But the motivational speakers forget, or are biased, about those things that are simply impossible. It’s only when you hit the wall that you learn there are, out there, a few but important things you can’t do.

A. You can’t change your personal history. It’s past tense. You can’t choose to born yourself again and relive your life in a better way.

B. You can’t force someone to feel something for you or for the others. You can manipulate a lot of things, you can “press some buttons” if you know them, but you can’t make changes in someone else’s soul. You can’t make someone love you. You can make yourself loveable, but that’s all you can do.

C. You can’t have all the opportunities you might want. It’s true, you can create yourself a lot of opportunities, through your own actions, but you need a lot of power to change really big things and often you don’t have so much power.

A, B & C are decent assumptions and I can tell I always knew them, but you know, there is that saying that there is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path. That is, theory is easy, but seeing the patterns in your own life, without any help from someone else, is hard.

A. For my entire life I was the Romanian rhinoceros wanting to be a Canadian rhinoceros. I was born like that however. With a lot of effort, I might live in Canada, but I will never be a Canadian… rhinoceros…

B. For many years I thought that, if I am the perfect he-rhinoceros, the she-rhinoceros will love me and will enjoy being in our partnership for the rest of our life. I tried everything; I can’t even feel guilty because I know I’ve tried everything. I can’t be the perfect he-rhinoceros. I am just another rhinoceros and she has other things on her mind…

C. In my jungle, I did things that no other rhinoceros could do, but the jungle didn’t need me. I struggled to survive in my jungle but at some point there was no meaning for me being there. Eventually, I had to move to another jungle. Here, this jungle needs my services of rhinoceros. I’m not happy either, but I’ve learned that I can’t change an entire jungle just for my own benefit. Each jungle has its respective rules…

I want you to scroll back to the image and have a look at it again. Take a couple of moments from your time and contemplate the running rhinoceros: look at its fatigue, look at the running carpet and think about the rhinoceros’s balance given its weight, take a look at the sweat drops (or maybe tears), and then take a look at the utopian unicorn, knowing that it doesn’t exist. Feel the situation, feel what’s inside its soul, try to be on the same wavelength with its feelings, its torment…

Now remind yourself that it is normal for a rhinoceros to be fat…

What would you tell to the rhinoceros?

Are there any situations in your life in which you’re just like the rhinoceros in the photo?

Even if it sounds weird, you’re given 2 options: you either continue your life pursuing the imaginary, utopian unicorn life, or accept your real, mundane rhinoceros life.

Yes, it’s about acceptance…

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3 thoughts on “I can’t

  1. We can’t change the past, but Jesus did! We can’t rebirth ourselves, but our Father can make us born anew of his Love, in his image and likeness, with an inheritance of good endowments and perfect gifts from above without variation or shadow of change. I searched psychology, spirituality and religion for Truth, but sitting on my couch in my home, God poured his Spirit and Fire upon me and began to transform me! Now my soul rests in our Father, pure Presence of Love and I am aware that I am in Presence and Presence is in me making me a watered garden in the kingdom of heaven on earth. May you be blessed and receive the deepest desires of your heart. I did, and if it happened to me, it can happen to all! ~Yvonne

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    • Thanks for your kind words, Yvonne! I guess however that we can’t actually be born again, physically. I’d say it’s rather a shift in our perception, a spiritual rebirth…

      Liked by 1 person

      • Exactly!!!! It is a spiritual rebirth and our entire being is made one with God’s Higher Being: his Christ, we become one body and one Spirit with God; our soul is purified, refined and we begin to live in the crystal clear Awareness of the pure Presence of God above, in and through us!!!! Bless you!

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